To Be Familiar with God

Originally posted on beloved:

My husband raised an interesting question this past weekend in his message.

He asked, “What do you think is the greatest enemy to faith?”

Many people would suggest that doubt is the greatest obstacle. Some believe fear or worry would be the biggest hindrance to faith. While all these are great suggestions and certainly true, Craig proposed another idea that most of us probably wouldn’t think about. He proposed that for many, the familiar is often the biggest obstacle to faith.

Think about it. Life becomes so familiar that we stop believing that God can change our circumstances. We think or say things like:

“I’ve prayed and nothing has changed.”

“I’ve tried to quit… but I just can’t.”

“I’ve always struggled with my weight.”

“We will always have a dysfunctional relationship.”

In fact, in our Life Group last week, almost everyone there expressed their willingness to pray with great faith…

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Well after all these tears. fears. wondering and wandering.

Life is like smiling.

 

Just that.

Let’s just give that away anywhere we are. A smile. An act of kidness.

Because first is to love Him and therefore love others just as the best versions of ourselves.

x.

Today, I danced again.

Yeah, did you know I haven’t dance in months? Like not in a stage, neither at a dance class. I haven’t dance by myself since several months ago

I had no motive at all, the movements didn’t use to pop as soon as I heard a song. Even I tried, I didn’t came from the heart.

And it hurted because it was a big sign that something was wrong. Not only mentally, nor emotionally, but spiritually.

I only can improvise a movement when I feel redemption in my veins, when the Spirit is one with me.

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Well, none of that happened. For someone who love much dancing, as anyone loves a good meal with a bunch of friends. The sparkle was gone.

The intimacy was gone?

The Spirit was gone?

No. That would be saying that happines equals the joy of the Spirit and no, it wasn’t that.

I have felt like quitting since like a while, quitting everything. Quit home. running away home. Quit friends. Quit reading His love letter.

Let’s add the fact that in a though way, I have earned to listen to God’s voice only. I came across with so many people comments that hurt me and even worst I even stopped to listen to them. You know, trolling, cynism and sceptisim can come even from someone who’s walking your very same road, but it doesn’t mean that they’re not gonna hurt you.

DSC09845The point is I wouldn’t say “Thank God for bad news, bad times and uncomfortable circumstances” because they’ve been emotionally hard to bear and one thing I’m not likely to be with God is unreal, I indeed tell him everything that cross my mind. I bet He sometimes discipline my thoughts, I’m sure He laughts at them in another cases. Even though nothing much changed, and some prayers reamined unanswered, one thing that these last days resound in my head has been:

Recapture the Father’s heart

And the thing is I found out we’ve spent too much time talking about reaching dreams, and trying in our efforts overcome struggles. And even it may sound a little like boycottt, we’re not our dreams. We are free to reach them indeed. But they are not a reliable place to rest, overnight they can be gone, and we are left with nothing.

What do all these has to do with dancing?DSC09842

A lot. Most of my dreams involve dancing and a lot of it. Beside being a translator my childlike dreams involves pretty much a musical. And I have fought with a lot of doubts “Does God lie?” “He does not know my imposibility to even jump?” and even though I know God can make miracles, I came to the fact that as much as I want my dreams come true, I’m just not letting God have all the control.

I’m sure Colossians 3.2 wasn’t much applied in my life.

These questions remain unanswered till today: I sincerely have no idea if all these dreams will become true, but even I can be the most anxious person alive every day, every single day I have tell to myself to thank, lie and let God do His thing. But even if these dreams do not come true what would happen?

 My shepherd is mysterious, but I’m sure He love His bride too much to let her be stained by the little foxes.

He wants my heart, He loves me and when I am face to face with such kindness I can’t help but dance.

Maybe that’s my reason to be.

To see Him smile first.

Ol’ days.

Oh, the childhood road. The blushing cheeks, the butterflies in the belly, the trees, the fear of making something wrong. Times when I believed that Leo Di Caprio actually died in ” Titanic”, so when  I saw him on “The beach“, I was kinda shocked.

At the age of 11, I wanted to have boobs. I wanted them. So bad, so bad. Like I had a straigh chest in comparison with everyone else. Now I see I have no idea what I yearned for them so much, they are not a big deal.

Beside this whole thing. 

Do you remember the first time you lost your innocence? Like, not when you found out that Santa wasn’t real or when you actually saw your parents setting your gift under the tree, I mean the real time when you lost the childlike heart. The wonder of watching the trees passing by, travelling to places where you thought it were miles away and then as an adult you found out it wasn’t that far from home, when ou’ve got flashbacks of those places, and the magic is there. The simpleness is there.

There is not what if’s, and less “I don’t think that will happen” feelings. As we step into the adult ground there’s mostly beyond responssbilites, there’s a huge piece called brain reasoning everything; you turn asking the most antagonist questions about everthing, because in all those cases life slaped and made us believe life’s not that easy. There’s something more back.

Ha! The human being, us, think that if we dig deep in knowledge, we would get to find the answer of everything, because we have all under control; sadly once we are about to die those answers do not apply to what we’re going through and mostly of our reasoning just made us waste the time of enjoyment instead of “discovering the truth“.

Maybe it’s t the fact that in our road to discover the truth, we just lost our child heart. We faced true life and there’s no place for little me here. 

Now there’s anger. Anger and revenge.

Now there’s pain. Pain in the chest, a heart on relief wide open as a public surgery to everyone.

Now there’s confusion. Everybody talks to much.

Now there’s real jobs. Being an artist who? Ain’t nobody got time for that.

And we fall into a cycle of scaping ourselves.

Shame. Pain. Give me noise. Give me wild life.  Give me those painkiller moments that drift as soon as I wake up on a Sunday midday.

When we run to them, to run from our pain. We have a serious problem. 

This only have I found: God created mankind upright, but they have gone in search of many schemes.’” (Ecclesiastes 7.29)

When we are children, we dream, we don’t hold forgiveness, we are happy of being hours running in the countryside, there is always yes for adventure, we believe in the warming love of life, we feel created to be free. And all these are real, it’s just that the monologues in our head are too mainstream and always ready to attack our hopes.

We are here, on earth struggling and fighting to be somebody, but let’s no forget we have a Father who’s ready to renew our heart as perfect as a childike one if we are willing to run to His arms.

 

 

Since I’m on vacation, I’m mostly taking time to relax enjoying the simple little things in life. In these automatic days, everything is routine, and personally I get lost more in the problems, complexities, health issues, and all that stressful stuff but thankfully I had the time to take pleasure in an amazing week with my girl Sofía.

Anyway since it seems that the Saviour brought me here to teach me, besides His purpose, embrace everything and also a even a new side of Himself. Oh, the more He shows, the most awareness I’ve got of Him.

One thing I kept on thinking today was that God made me. Made us. He is the Creator, there he is creative indeed. And as you may guess I went right to the dictionary to search for this adjective meaning and I found:

CreativeCharacterized by originality and expressiveness; imaginative.

So what?

Well, as few people know I’ve been captive, lately, by the old epic legends from the XVIII and XX century, you know when the TRUE artists used to give their life through art. Expressing their own ideas and imagination through cinema. music, etc.

Therefore I found myself figuring out that we are made in God’s image. We create, because He also does it. We express, such as He does through His creation. We are His.

Summing up, all my weird ideas, as I see myself enjoying all this creative movies and compositions I get to feel their art in an inexpressible way so…

Why can’t we embrace that and just enjoy the Maker, where you can find full pleasure?

A further pleasure that art or even this world brings.

Just, let’s think of thatl.