I haven’t had to go to college since Wednesay, I’ve been staying awake all nights long watching Downton Abbey S2 because that’s how I roll it. I ended up weeping. NEVER AGAIN.
Anyway, I’ve been scrolling through my old tweets, the one from the early ’10, when I was like 19 and saying goodbye to the teenage recklesness, it was cool; much to my surprise it’s weird to read me swearing as if I was a storm drain (I hope that’s the expression in english, otherwise you south american peeps know what I’m talking about)
But one true sad thing, it’s my sense of humor was priceless back then; I used to laugh the hell out of me, I’m still a joker but I’m not so funny anymore.
This whole thing I think started when I started to get sorrounded by the wrong people at the wrong time adding the fact that I started to feed myself with the most poisonous pies. You know when you’re an anti-cliché girl like me, you try to avoid any kind of over-used thought, so as a result, and don’t ask me how I ended up thinking that by telling me bashing “facts” but ultimately true, I would be the opposite of the typical 21th century girl. That that’s better a hard truth than a lie.
But what happenes when the filter goes torn, and you get to a point when you don’t wether something is true or it’s false? When you’re just wounded and you keep prompting the acid thoughts in your head?
And even thought we have to support each other, we all know that but what if that other keeps pushing the worst of you. And they shout you out. And they tell you, you are wrong. And even with an admired person gives something that seems like aprovements that what they’re saying, you feel wounded. Really wounded.
That if something is poising 1) your relationship with Christ 2) the relationship with yourself, reconsider that Jesus wasn’t all peace yo and alright with everyone. Throughout His word I can see how He sounds so poured out in love and in other times we see how he takes way many things to His heart. He wasn’t scared of falling short of people expectations.
We were created with a mouth and free will but also self-control.
As JJ Heller song would say: “You have a voice, you have to use it“
The whole idea is love isn’t “I embrace everything because I’m a good girl“. It is, as Christ, I’ll set boundaries in love.
That can be good not only for you but for that person.
And what about now? I’m the funniest girl, again. Nope.
Detoxing your soul, should be as cleaning the heart for Him to place it.